I Have to Stop Drinking

Oh God, I want to die... How could I have let this happen (Is this becoming a pattern?). Monday night and the blood and tears at AIR7's and Scheisser's... And tonight we have to "talk it out..." I DON'T WANT to talk it out... This is my worst nightmare and will all have come true in a few hours...

Oh God! Just when I thought things were getting better. I have to stop drinking. I have to stop drinking.

What is happening to me?